Emotional ambivalence: when love and hate coexist for 5 minutes. Do you feel affectionate ambivalence? Read this article to learn more about what it is and how it can affect your life situation.
Emotional ambivalence as a concept clearly reflects human complexity. The state means the ability to hate and love at the same time. The feelings you experience include attachment, betrayal, tension, and sadness at the same time. This is common and normal.
Attachment ambivalence is a type of complex feeling with contradiction and tension. An example is when you love and hate someone at the same time. This means that you may have strong affection for someone close to you, but at the same time treat them with bitterness. Even if you want to be friendly, you feel pain.
Why do people so often face these conflicting and unpleasant feelings? Is this normal or is it a temporary imbalance? This is actually completely normal. At the same time, he shows the enormous complexity of human beings in terms of emotions. X-big pt – normal \ “> Research on emotional ambivalence
It is not surprising that this topic is of great interest to the scientific community, and on it There have been several studies and studies. It looks like something out of a novel for neurologists, psychiatrists and emotional psychologists. So it shows how complex your feelings in a relationship can be.
Researchers including Frank van Harreveld from the University of Amsterdam have studied this subject. for example, there are women who experience emotional ambivalence after childbirth.
They love their newborn, but at the same time, they feel the sudden chaotic mixture of emotions such as exhaustion, abandonment, tenderness and fear that define the first months of motherhood.
“You know that when I hate, it’s because I love you with a passion that makes my soul let go.”
– Julie de Lespinasse-
Emotional ambivalence – defining qualities
Whether a person suffers or enjoys it, affectionate ambivalence is a feeling that all people experience at some point in their lives. … When it comes to emotion, names like Daniel Goleman and Paul Ekman often come up. However, it is worth mentioning that this has been studied since the beginning of the 20th century, and then described it as the simultaneous presence of two opposite emotions, like attraction and aversion. This indicates two conflicting directions of will.
Since then, psychology has been constantly interested in this subject, which seems to be two separate areas. Because attachment ambivalence is so common in relationships, the field of social psychology has taken an interest in it in recent years.
What is the reason for this? Many decisions people make are controversial. For example, let’s say you want to buy a certain product, but you can’t do it right now. Or you need a specific job in another country, but you don’t want to risk leaving your home.
Contradiction causes pain
Attachment – or emotional ambivalence creates extreme anxiety. Unfortunately, the energy and wear and tear of this type of dissonance is enormous. So much so that sometimes you even get confused in these feelings. You may suddenly feel the tremendous love or affection you have for someone or something. But at the same time, you feel tired, rejected, and even hate.
You may love a certain person, but you hate their behavior and attitudes, including the way they are referred to you. At the same time, be mindful of your adolescence. This important stage in your life is a constant conflict with the pursuit of experience. For example, there is fear, anxiety, lust, intensity, and anxiety at the same time. Dealing with such internal conflicts is not easy, and we all know about it.
Emotional ambivalence prompts you to make decisions
We all know that affectionate or emotional ambivalence is synonymous with contradiction. However, this has a positive effect. It is what makes you decide, clarify, or even accept certain situations. For example, mothers who experience ambivalent attachment after childbirth gradually accept their new reality.
When you love and hate someone at the same time, it makes you understand the reality of that feeling. Is love more important than hate? Is this contradiction natural? Or do you need hatred to make rational decisions?
Dr. Laura Ress of the University of Michigan conducted a study in 2013 that yielded interesting results: Attachment ambivalence promotes self-awareness. This emotional anxiety is what the brain needs to calm down and solve problems effectively. In fact, this type of contradiction has been shown to increase your creativity. It forces you to look for new ways of thinking and discover your beliefs at the same time. You can invent original solutions as a result of contradiction.
Thus, when you see yourself In such a personal maze, it is worth stopping, listening and thinking. Maybe this is a sign that you need to figure something out or solve something.
Life itself is a contradiction, and emotions are even more so. Obviously, loving is not easy and requires a lot of responsibility.